The 10 things you need to know about getting engaged over the holidays



Brooke Schultz Photography

It’s the holidays, and that means that we’re all going to be surrounded by family and loved ones for the next few weeks. That also means that some very lucky girls are going to get very sparkly engagement rings very soon. For all you future brides to be, that means that engagement and wedding etiquette starts…NOW! Announcing your engagement and balancing family and  navigating sticky social situations can be trying, so here are some DOs and DON’Ts* to help you get through holiday season with minimal etiquette offenses.

DO bring holiday cheer to your family gathering and announce that you’re engaged for the group (keeping in mind the caveat below).

DON’T make a big announcement if anyone in attendance may be sensitive to the issue of engagement, like an older sister who’s been dying to get engaged herself or a recently divorced cousin. (Tell people in private in that case.)

DON’T share your news online until you’ve told your family at the holiday gathering. And if you’ll see your best buds for New Year’s, why not wait ‘til you can tell them in person?

DO think about when (approximately) you’d like to get married. That question will definitely come up at family holiday gatherings.

DON’T feel bad if the Christmas or Hanukkah gift you got your boyfriend doesn’t match up with the engagement ring he bought you. He knows you wouldn’t have gotten him socks if you knew an engagement ring was coming!

DO get your guy a nice engagement gift once your budget’s recovered from holiday present-buying.

DON’T expect an additional holiday gift from your now-fiance. Engagement rings are expensive!

DON’T throw an engagement party before the New Year (if you want people to show). Your friends already have a billion holiday parties they’ve agreed to attend, and they’ll need more notice than a few days.

DON’T take it personally if your friends don’t text you back after you tell them your news on Christmas Eve or Christmas. This may be the one time of year they’re not glued to their phones–or they’d rather get in touch when they’re on their own turf instead of at Aunt Mary’s holiday dinner.

DO look your best for any potential proposal outing if you care about how those first engagement photos come out.  And if you don’t get engaged, at least you’ll look hot!

*Disclaimer: These DOs and DON’Ts originally appeared on Glamour. We loved them so much we wanted to share them with you lovely brides!



  1. Great tips! I’ve got one for the one doing the proposing: try your best to find her correct ring size. My husband did try, he grabbed a ring out of my jewelry box — but it was one I wear on my thumb! As you can guess, my engagement ring needed to be resized, but I wanted to wear it to all the family gatherings. My McGiver solution: tape wrapped around the underside. Not too pretty but it worked.